I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
