and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Randomize
