69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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