My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
