Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
