Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
