yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i found two dead squirrels on my front step this morning.. do you think they have something to do with my missing phone?
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
