margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
It's like God shit irony all over that family
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Randomize
