Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Randomize
