not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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