why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
