What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize