i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
