okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
