fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
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