nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Randomize
