in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Also I can show up hungover, fall asleep at my desk, and smell like a bottle of whiskey, and they still like me more then my shitty co worker
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
