Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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