Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Bahahaha I just turned on the fan in front of the elliptical to avoid puking//try to get some baywatch hair going and the guy next to me thanked me because he was "getting nauseas from the smell of stale sweat and tequila"
Randomize
