This girl is more easily done than said...
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize