Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
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