am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
