Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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