he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Randomize
