and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
