Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
