Whod you bang
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
