I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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