he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize