So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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