dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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