last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize
