I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
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