Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize
