And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
this boner is exhausting
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
