Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
i think my cat just said my name.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
dude. I can hear the air.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
