i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Cover your peen. We're going out.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
