So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
