Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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