I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
