i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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