Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
