Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize
