just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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