the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
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