I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Randomize
