Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
