All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
