never play flip cup with pint glasses
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Randomize
