community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
